Ruben Amorim has got away with Manchester United being sh*te up to now. But that defeat is mainly on him and a little bit on his “horrific” centre-back.
After half an hour, Gary Neville described Manchester United as “the worst pound-for-pound football team in the country”, just before Joshua Zirkzee was cheered off the pitch by his own fans, shortly after Sandro Tonali hit the post while trying to walk in Newcastle’s third goal in one of the most one-sided Premier League games we’ve ever seen.
The writing was on the wall as soon as the teamsheets were released, and while Marcus Rashford was the story, his return buried what should have been the lede: Christian Eriksen and Casemiro starting together in midfield. Insanity.
Ruben Amorim has been given a gentler ride than Manchester United’s terrible results and even worse performances deserve so far. New system, off-pitch problems, limited time to train, yada yada yada. But there is no excuse for playing those two together, an indefensible decision no matter who Manchester United are playing, but particularly deplorable against arguably the most dynamic and in-form midfield three in the Premier League.
We would be scouring the Under-15s for No.6s before turning to that pair as there is simply no way they weren’t going to be overpowered, outrun and outplayed against Tonali, Bruno Guimaraes and Joelinton. As it proved, with both of Newcastle’s goals featuring the ball being popped quickly and easily around one or both of Casemiro and Eriksen in midfield, before going out to the left ahead of a delivery into the box.
A lot was made by the Sky Sports pundits ahead of the game about the team selection being dictated by United’s horrendous record when defending corners and set pieces. It goes some way to explaining Casemiro’s inclusion and a long way to explaining Zirkzee’s, with Amorim confirming ahead of the game that he did have the Dutchman’s height and physicality in mind, both in attack and defence.
That plan was ripped up after 33 minutes when Zirkzee was withdrawn for Mainoo, much to the delight of a significant number of United fans, who were at least as glad to see the back of Zirkzee as they were pleased to see his replacement take to the field.
In the same way as you might describe a rabbit being taken for a walk on a lead or using a spoon to eat your Christmas dinner, Neville described Amorim’s view that Zirkzee is more of a No.10 than a No.9 as “interesting” before watching him in what could very well be his last ever performance for United. He’s already been heavily linked with a return to Serie A and we suspect if he hasn’t already been in touch with his agent to follow up on those leads while watching the last hour from the bench at Old Trafford he soon will be.
Lisandro Martinez lasted twice as long as Zirkzee before being hooked for Leny Yoro but will be very fortunate to be in the team for what looks likely to be a harrowing clash against Liverpool on January 5. He didn’t bother to mark actual Alexander Isak for Newcastle’s first, before failing to get off the ground as Joelinton barged in the second. As Neville said on co-comms, his defending was “horrific”, in that moment and others, in this game and others this season.
Entirely predictably, despite having his youthful exuberance stripped away this season, Mainoo made a big difference after he came on, for no greater reason than being able to run. Having been wholly embarrassed on their own patch by Newcastle in the first half an hour, it was a pretty even game from that point on, with United arguably having the better of it.
Which only increases the blame and criticism that should be levelled at Amorim, whom we would give some credit for recognising his mistake early doors if it wasn’t so obvious and awful. And while nothing changes after this result – he still needs time, better players and all the rest of it – it’s got to be a concern that a head coach that’s spent any time with this Manchester United squad deems a Casemiro-Eriksen axis workable and Zirkzee as a between-the-lines forward who can link the play between those infirm midfielders and a goal-shy striker.
After Ipswich’s shock win over Chelsea, Amorim’s side are now just seven points above the relegation zone and in relegation form after five defeats in their last six. And Amorim can now expect the pressure on him to ramp up exponentially having thrown away all of his free passes, with leeway expunged and the worst honeymoon in history brought very much to an end after making baffling and inexcusable decisions that gave Manchester United no chance against a Newcastle team that couldn’t believe their luck.
