The idea that Marcus Rashford is trouble has long been a click machine; some will contort themselves to get Man Utd fans on board…

Rash decision
The media has long been invested in Marcus Rashford being trouble. That equals clicks. So we know why the Express have pulled this nefarious bollocks, but it does not make it any more excusable.

With Rashford playing in the Champions League with Aston Villa tonight and crisis eternally swirling around Manchester United, the time is now for gossip about the boy grown-assed man.

Which is how we get here…

‘Man Utd proven right about Marcus Rashford as Aston Villa dressing room view emerges’

Obviously what you are supposed to think is that Rashford has been a) lazy, b) a c*** or hopefully c) a lazy c***, thus proving Manchester United ‘right’ to send him out on loan.

The problem? Well apart from ‘literally everything’, is that Rashford has been neither a) nor b) and so very obviously not c). In fact, as John McGinn has said, Rashford and fellow new signing Marco Asensio are “good guys who are hungry to succeed, and they’ve worked hard”.

And that’s the ‘dressing-room view’ (we had to insert the hyphen, it was making us itch) that has ’emerged’.

So how to spin that as ‘proving Man Utd right’? Not that it matters once you have clicked, obviously.

‘Rashford’s early success at Villa Park proves the Red Devils right for backing his quality when committing to a new five-year contract in 2023, a decision for which they’ve been slammed.’

Sorry what? The best story you can muster is that Manchester United have been proved right in giving Rashford a £320,000-a-week contract almost two years ago because he “hungry to succeed” while on loan at Aston Villa?

But never mind the reasoning, count the clicks.

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Naive much?
‘IT was an FA Cup weekend which showed just how far Manchester United have fallen,’ writes The Sun‘s Chief Sports Writer and – this seems important – Fulham fan Dave Kidd.

Firstly, was it balls; the Premier League table does that. But let’s hear him out…

‘In a fascinating quarter-final line-up, there are four clubs – Bournemouth, Brighton, Fulham and Crystal Palace – who have never won the Cup but who have realistic ambitions of doing so on May 17.

‘All four are infinitely smaller than United but sit above Ruben Amorim’s men in the Premier League table.

‘So when Rooney doubts United’s stated ambition of winning the title in their 150th anniversary year of 2028 – chief executive Omar Berrada’s so-called ‘Project 21’ – he is absolutely right.’

That ‘so’ is making one hell of a leap; the theory is that because Manchester United are not in the FA Cup but some measurably better sides are, Manchester United should not be targeting a Premier League win within the next three seasons?

Penny for the thoughts of Kidd in 2016 when Chelsea finished below Southampton, West Ham and Stoke and then won the actual Premier League the following season? We imagine as a Fulham fan he might feel a little sore about that. And he should certainly remember.

‘Portuguese Amorim is a searingly honest press-conference operator but he was wrong to sneer at Rooney with his ‘that is why I’m manager of Manchester United at 40’ jibe.

‘That Rooney’s managerial career has stalled after four underwhelming jobs by the age of 39 does not mean his comments lack credibility.’

It wasn’t ‘sneering’ and it wasn’t a ‘jibe’; Amorim manages a club with a plethora of former footballers being paid to voice their opinions despite no discernible managerial success and he was right to point out that being a pundit is “really easy”. It’s far easier than being the manager of a sh*tshow of a Premier League football club.

Will Manchester United win the title in the next three years? Probably not. But imagine the media reaction if they admitted that was a pipe dream? This Is Manchester United Football Club We Are Talking About, after all.

‘Are only successful football managers allowed to assess football managers?

‘Sir David Attenborough has never been a Rwandan mountain gorilla but he made a decent fist of talking about them.’

How very droll.

Seriously, are we really pretending that Amorim did not agree with Rooney’s assessment that he was being “naive” because he knew about Rooney’s rotten Championship record with Birmingham and Plymouth? What did people expect him to say? “Well of course Wayne is right…I am naive because Manchester United are proper sh*t and always will be.”?

‘The idea of United targeting the title in 2028 is nonsense.

‘Before they can even think about challenging Liverpool, Arsenal or Manchester City, they must get past that little lot of FA Cup quarter-finalists – Brighton, Bournemouth, Fulham and Palace.

‘United are not experiencing a one-season blip. They are suffering from a dozen years of rank boardroom mismanagement.

‘Would you bet on them finishing above Brighton, Bournemouth, Fulham or Palace next season?’

Yes. Absolutely. Two seasons ago Chelsea finished below three of that quartet of clubs. Last season they finished above them all and will likely do so again this season.

Welcome to football, Dave.

‘Bournemouth and Brighton are diamond miners in the global transfer market, Fulham are more adept at recycling unwanted Premier League players and at Palace it’s a mix of the two approaches.

‘But all have succeeded while United have continually failed. And these are the clubs United must surpass before they even think about challenging to be champions of England again.’

Pesky fact: Even amid all this ‘continual failure’, in a Premier League table of results since 2013, Manchester United are still sixth. And almost 200 points ahead of the next team.

Does it feel fair? No. Does it mean Manchester United – with almost quadruple the revenue of Fulham – will likely return to the top six? Afraid so, fella. Dare we say it’s a bit naive to think otherwise…

According to one of Real Betis’ club chiefs, Manchester United outcast Antony has already let slip what he wants to do next season.

The 25-year-old joined Man Utd from Eredivisie giants Ajax during the 2022 summer transfer window for a ridiculous fee of around £86m, contributing to them being second in our five-year Premier League net spend table. 

Former boss Erik ten Hag made Brazil international Antony his top target as he was keen to reunite with the winger after they worked together at Ajax.

The Dutch outfit made fools of Man Utd, who were made to massively overpay for the winger, who has proven a huge flop at Man Utd.

Antony only has 12 goals and five assists in his 96 appearances for Man Utd, and he dropped in the pecking order at the start of this season, falling to make a single Premier League start.

READ: Manchester United, Amorim, Arsenal and West Ham feature heavily in ten biggest cock-ups this season

Old Trafford chiefs sanctioned Antony’s exit during the winter transfer window as they attempted to raise funds for additions and he joined La Liga outfit Real Betis on loan.

Antony has enjoyed a remarkable start at Real Betis, grabbing three goals and two assists in his seven appearances.

Despite this, Man Utd remain open to letting Antony leave permanently in the summer. A recent report claimed INEOS would be happy with a 50% loss as their asking price has been set at around £41m. 

Now, Real Betis’ CEO Ramon Alarcon claims Antony has already informed him that he wants to commit his future to Real Betis for another year.

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Alarcon said: “The other day, Antony told me that he wanted to stay another year.

“The player is very comfortable here and was surprised by the facilities we gave him to settle in the city as soon as he arrived.”

Antony and several more Man Utd players could leave this summer, as they need to sell before they can buy.

Man Utd’s budget will be boosted by the exits of four stars in the final few months of their contract as the futures of Victor Lindelof, Christian Eriksen, Jonny Evans and Tom Heaton are in serious doubt.

The Red Devils can cope without each player and a report in Portugal claims Lindlof wants a return to Benfica upon the expiry of his contract this summer.

According to reports, Manchester United have ‘accounted for’ their continued absence from the Champions League to ease staff ‘concerns’.

INEOS supremo Sir Jim Ratcliffe inherited a mess at Old Trafford and has been heavily criticised since completing his takeover of Man Utd at the start of 2024.

The British billionaire initially purchased a 28% stake in the Premier League giants for around £1.25bn before upping his share to 29% for an extra £79m. As part of this deal, he took over from the Glazer family in running footballing matters at Old Trafford.

Ratcliffe has had plenty of difficult decisions to make as he’s attempted to reduce United’s debt and he’s sanctioned a major cost-cutting programme.

The 72-year-old has rapidly gone from hero to villain as he’s hiked ticket prices, sanctioned mass redundancies, scrapped Christmas benefits and payments to club legends and cut staff lunches.

READ: Manchester United, Amorim, Arsenal and West Ham feature heavily in ten biggest cock-ups this season

Man Utd are second in our five-year Premier League net spend table and their recent struggles on the pitch have added to their misery after they failed to qualify for the Champions League last season.

The Red Devils are languishing in the bottom half of the Premier League table, which is partly thanks to them sitting 14th in our calendar-year standings.

United chiefs are facing a busy few months as they look to boost their budget ahead of what could be a major squad overhaul in the summer.

Their poor performances in the Premier League are already impacting plans, according to a report from The Telegraph. 

It’s claimed Man Utd are ‘budgeting without Champions League football next season’ and ‘are planning for playing in Europa League, at most, for next four years rather than Champions League’.

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To ease staff ‘concerns’, Man Utd have ‘accounted for the prospect of the club missing out on European qualification this season’. The report explains:

‘United announced last week that there would be up to a further 200 job cuts on top of the 250 redundancies from last summer as part of the club’s ongoing drive to save money after pre-tax losses of £313 million in the last three seasons.

‘Budgeting going forward has been calculated under the assumption that United qualify for the Europa League for the next four years – a marked change after years of budgeting to reach the Champions League knockout stages.

‘Telegraph Sport believes this caused some concern and unease among staff fearful of the financial implications and knock-on effect on jobs if United fail to secure European qualification this term.

‘However, it has emerged that United have factored in the threat of no European football at Old Trafford next season as part of their costings.’

Manchester United chiefs have been urged to sanction deals to sign Southampton’s Tyler Dibling and Ipswich Town’s Liam Delap this summer.

The Red Devils are working with a limited budget and they will have to offload unwanted talents to raise funds for additions this summer.

Man Utd are already second in our Premier League net spend table and Patrick Dorgu was their only marquee signing in January, while Marcus Rashford and Antony left on loan.

A major squad overhaul is required at Old Trafford to boost Ruben Amorim, with his side sitting in the bottom half of our Premier League form table.

United are already linked with potential targets ahead of the summer, with one of their priorities likely the addition of a new striker.

Ipswich standout Delap has been mentioned as a target as the Englishman, who has ten goals and two assists in his 26 Premier League appearances this season. He is expected to leave Kieran McKenna’s side if/when they get relegated and Man City have a £40m buy-back clause.

Southampton starlet Dibling is also linked with Man Utd. The Premier League strugglers reportedly slapped a £55m asking price on their prized asset in January to ward off interest from rivals.

Ex-United player Paul Parker has explained why his former club should sign the two Premier League youngsters.

“100% Man United should look at Tyler Dibling and Liam Delap,” Parker said.

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“For Delap, you have to look at what Man United need, and they need a striker who is hungry and wants to prove a point.

“His dad wasn’t anywhere near being the player his son is, so I am sure he is proud of where his son is and what he is doing.

“Delap has to choose a club where he is guaranteed game time and I am sure he is looking at Man United to give him that.”

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On Dibling, he added: “For Dibling, he would be looking at the Man United midfield and think to himself: I am better than all of them. He can run with the ball, he can pass the ball and he can score goals. He runs beyond as well.”

Parker has also encouraged Delap and Dibling to snub rival interest to “become heroes” at Man Utd.

“Man United should be looking at both of them, but it is also about whether they are ambitious enough to go to Man United or if they want a move to clubs who are functioning a bit better, but maybe doesn’t have the same status,” Parker added.

“But if they want to make a name for themselves, make it at Manchester United, because it will be known everywhere.

“They have the chance to change something and become heroes, and that should mean something.”